It’s easy to look back on our past selves with judgment.
To cringe at who we used to be — what we tolerated, how we behaved, the things we didn’t yet know.
We often call that version “naive,” “broken,” “messy,” or “lost.”
But here’s a gentle truth we often forget:
The old you deserved love, too.
Even the Unhealed Version Was Worthy
You may not have had strong boundaries.
You may have overgiven, over-apologized, or stayed too long.
You may have been insecure, reactive, unsure of who you were.
But that doesn’t make you any less worthy of care, kindness, and compassion.
The version of you who was struggling still had a good heart.
Still tried.
Still mattered.
Growth Doesn’t Mean Shame
Healing isn’t about disowning who you were.
It’s about honoring the fact that you did your best with what you knew at the time.
You don’t have to love your choices to love the person who made them.
You were surviving. Learning. Navigating.
And sometimes, that looked messy — but it was still brave.
You don’t need to erase your past to be proud of your progress.
You Can Hold Compassion and Accountability Together
Yes, you’ve grown.
Yes, you’ve changed.
Yes, you’re learning to do better now.
But you don’t have to hate the person you were in order to celebrate who you’re becoming.
Growth with compassion is what real healing looks like.
Talk to your old self like someone who needed love, not punishment.
You’ve Always Been Deserving
Not just now that you’re wiser.
Not just now that you’ve healed a little more.
But then, too — when you were scared, unsure, trying to figure it all out.
So if you ever catch yourself saying,
“I can’t believe I used to be like that,”
try instead:
“Wow. Look how far I’ve come — and how much love that version of me needed.”
Because no matter the season or the mistakes,
the old you deserved love, too.
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